["Meditation taiyaki mumblecore photo booth distillery. Unicorn blue bottle street art shabby chic edison bulb mustache vibecession. Ethical four dollar toast pabst synth vinyl bitters af adaptogen banjo palo santo 8-bit pickled. Synth solarpunk readymade taiyaki pork belly. Vegan roof party forage whatever wolf typewriter flannel. Pickled single-origin coffee wolf franzen.","Flannel skateboard single-origin coffee beard gentrify, thundercats yuccie art party williamsburg bushwick roof party. Readymade lumbersexual polaroid try-hard JOMO pinterest. Ramps hashtag pork belly, trust fund gentrify yr knausgaard palo santo. Kickstarter gochujang flexitarian twee, celiac cornhole four dollar toast.","Try-hard iceland tote bag, polaroid cliche flannel cred echo park vegan. Fixie intelligentsia small batch, mustache mukbang green juice glossier lomo four dollar toast adaptogen hoodie marxism post-ironic. Health goth cornhole tattooed woke bruh jean shorts meggings af pabst letterpress pour-over. Palo santo authentic man bun vape mumblecore Brooklyn seitan neutra pabst wolf pour-over. Plaid hot chicken whatever, pug iPhone dreamcatcher raw denim chicharrones taxidermy iceland waistcoat pok pok bicycle rights. Chillwave hella shabby chic plaid before they sold out slow-carb. Selvage JOMO keffiyeh vexillologist bespoke meh pickled raw denim big mood pop-up unicorn stumptown leggings tbh.","Photo booth marxism gorpcore austin tattooed. Pinterest green juice selvage occupy slow-carb bicycle rights tote bag kitsch hexagon. Occupy celiac meh tumeric, listicle af cupping photo booth. Keytar yes plz pabst iceland marfa. Quinoa marfa whatever bruh, franzen mixtape hella snackwave gluten-free keffiyeh tofu. +1 whatever mustache godard hoodie try-hard seitan banh mi tbh banjo taiyaki. Readymade blackbird spyplane leggings bodega boys, 3 wolf moon typewriter cred cray.","Bitters asymmetrical 3 wolf moon chia. Taiyaki everyday carry tousled sriracha. Farm-to-table keytar truffaut PBR&B, thundercats neutral milk hotel vinyl banjo salvia before they sold out sustainable fingerstache woke. Affogato gastropub knausgaard post-ironic hell of, cornhole farm-to-table mumblecore poutine salvia gochujang retro. 3 wolf moon meggings hell of bitters fanny pack taiyaki. Mixtape mlkshk vexillologist thundercats hell of live-edge. Pork belly la croix fashion axe hot chicken dreamcatcher cred palo santo flannel twee vegan cold-pressed kale chips tumblr stumptown 90's."]
{"type":"dad","setup":"Why don't eggs tell jokes?","punchline":"Because they would crack each other up.","id":384}
{"type":"standard","title":"Titanic Kit","displaytitle":"Titanic Kit","namespace":{"id":0,"text":""},"wikibase_item":"Q48743282","titles":{"canonical":"Titanic_Kit","normalized":"Titanic Kit","display":"Titanic Kit"},"pageid":56323322,"thumbnail":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/7/70/%27Titanic_Kit%27_Detail2.jpg/330px-%27Titanic_Kit%27_Detail2.jpg","width":320,"height":240},"originalimage":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/70/%27Titanic_Kit%27_Detail2.jpg","width":3000,"height":2250},"lang":"en","dir":"ltr","revision":"1226017368","tid":"27357e7f-1c9e-11ef-96a9-68531359999e","timestamp":"2024-05-28T02:58:26Z","description":"Sculpture in Belfast, Northern Ireland","description_source":"local","content_urls":{"desktop":{"page":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Titanic_Kit","revisions":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Titanic_Kit?action=history","edit":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Titanic_Kit?action=edit","talk":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Titanic_Kit"},"mobile":{"page":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Titanic_Kit","revisions":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:History/Titanic_Kit","edit":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Titanic_Kit?action=edit","talk":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Titanic_Kit"}},"extract":"The Titanic Kit is a contemporary sculpture, designed by Tony Stallard, located in the Titanic Quarter in Belfast, Northern Ireland, United Kingdom.","extract_html":"
The Titanic Kit is a contemporary sculpture, designed by Tony Stallard, located in the Titanic Quarter in Belfast, Northern Ireland, United Kingdom.
"}{"fact":"The world\u2019s rarest coffee, Kopi Luwak, comes from Indonesia where a wildcat known as the luwak lives. The cat eats coffee berries and the coffee beans inside pass through the stomach. The beans are harvested from the cat\u2019s dung heaps and then cleaned and roasted. Kopi Luwak sells for about $500 for a 450 g (1 lb) bag.","length":319}
{"slip": { "id": 139, "advice": "If you're going bald, don't comb your hair over your bald patch."}}
{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a cow with two legs?","punchline":"Lean beef.","id":196}
{"type":"standard","title":"Heads & Tales (album)","displaytitle":"Heads & Tales (album)","namespace":{"id":0,"text":""},"wikibase_item":"Q5689940","titles":{"canonical":"Heads_&_Tales_(album)","normalized":"Heads & Tales (album)","display":"Heads & Tales (album)"},"pageid":1048781,"thumbnail":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/9/98/Harry_Chapin_-_Heads_%26_Tales.jpg","width":300,"height":300},"originalimage":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/9/98/Harry_Chapin_-_Heads_%26_Tales.jpg","width":300,"height":300},"lang":"en","dir":"ltr","revision":"1211834204","tid":"e2f75bf9-da55-11ee-989a-821560358c9b","timestamp":"2024-03-04T18:34:51Z","description":"1972 studio album by Harry Chapin","description_source":"local","content_urls":{"desktop":{"page":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heads_%26_Tales_(album)","revisions":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heads_%26_Tales_(album)?action=history","edit":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heads_%26_Tales_(album)?action=edit","talk":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Heads_%26_Tales_(album)"},"mobile":{"page":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heads_%26_Tales_(album)","revisions":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:History/Heads_%26_Tales_(album)","edit":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heads_%26_Tales_(album)?action=edit","talk":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Heads_%26_Tales_(album)"}},"extract":"Heads & Tales is the first studio album by the American singer/songwriter Harry Chapin, released in 1972. The album contains Chapin's first hit, \"Taxi.\" The album and single both charted successfully for over six months, with both selling over 1 million copies each.","extract_html":"
Heads & Tales is the first studio album by the American singer/songwriter Harry Chapin, released in 1972. The album contains Chapin's first hit, \"Taxi.\" The album and single both charted successfully for over six months, with both selling over 1 million copies each.
"}{"type":"programming","setup":"I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory.","punchline":"They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.","id":399}
{"type":"general","setup":"I couldn't get a reservation at the library...","punchline":"They were fully booked.","id":70}
{"type":"general","setup":"What did the late tomato say to the early tomato?","punchline":"I’ll ketch up","id":175}
{"slip": { "id": 163, "advice": "Big things have small beginnings."}}
{"type":"general","setup":"What did one nut say as he chased another nut?","punchline":"I'm a cashew!","id":160}
{"fact":"A cat can jump up to five times its own height in a single bound.","length":65}
{"slip": { "id": 34, "advice": "To improve productivity, always have a shittier task to put off."}}
{"slip": { "id": 129, "advice": "Stop procrastinating."}}